By Megan Walrod, Copywriting Coach
Have you read, “The Art of Asking,” by Amanda Palmer?
Palmer writes about how it’s such a vulnerable thing to ask and how, when we ask, we open a door to greater intimacy in all of our relationships.
She talks about how our fear of being vulnerable,
of being seen as weak,
of hearing a no,
holds us back from asking.
As does our doubt:
do we deserve this?
Palmer’s book got me looking at myself. I saw the ways I’ve judged myself as weak and needy. I also saw more clearly how there is so much strength and beauty in asking!
Whether we’re asking for
We invite people to step into our lives more intimately. We get to share the vulnerabilities of life together in strength and dynamic realness.
It takes courage and vulnerability to ASK.
Are you asking?
Or are you withholding possibilities of greater connection?
What might you ask for today that you’ve never had the courage to ask for until now?
How might your asking be an invitation to the Universe to collaborate with you?
Here are 4 tips to support you in asking for what you desire (because if you don’t ask, the answer is always NO!):
1) Get in touch with your DESIRE for something
- Desire is different from need: need comes from the energy of lack; desire comes from the energy of possibility.
- Your desire has potency in it, it’s like a built in magnet for that which you desire. When you get in touch with your desire, you strengthen the possibility of receiving what you desire.
- Doubt tends to dissolve in the face of pure desire. BONUS!
2) Use CLEAR and SPECIFIC language
- Whether you’re asking for a referral, money, a date or a dance, be clear about it.
- Don’t waste a lot of words or energy explaining yourself, trying to guilt-trip the other person into saying yes, or going into convincing mode. None of this is actually attraction or effective.
- Do use clear and specific language by asking a direct question.
3) Let go of EXPECTATIONS
- Notice: are you expecting a YES? A NO?
- Your expectations taint your ASK. They block you from receiving. PERIOD.
- If you were expecting a YES and hear a NO, or you hear a YES and were expecting a NO, you go into the wrongness of the exchange rather than the beauty of it all.
4) Receive their response as a GIFT and GIVE THANKS
- The courage it took you to ASK is a gift you give to yourself and the other person.
- No matter what their response is, it is a gift. PERIOD. Whether it is a YES or a NO, what if you viewed it as RIGHT?
- Thank them for receiving and responding to your request. When you partner an ASK with GRATITUDE you discover it becomes easier to ask, and easier for others to receive your asks.
So there you go: 4 tips to create more ease with your asking. Which of these 4 tips are you going to put into action today? I’d love to hear from you in the comments below.
Stay tuned for Part 2 in this series where I share about the connection between asking and your business.
What else is possible when we’re willing to ask and be more vulnerable with each other?
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ABOUT THE WRITER
Megan Walrod, Founder of Live Your Yes, LLC, is a copywriting coach, speaker and #1 bestselling author. Over the past decade she has supported hundreds of entrepreneurs to create authentic and lucrative marketing materials. Megan encourages her clients to “Live Your Yes,” knowing that when we live an inspired life, we are more magnetic and create greater success for everyone.
If you get tripped up with knowing what’s YES for you, or you get in your own way with choosing your YES because of people-pleasing or not feeling like you deserve it, connect with Megan on Facebook. Find out more about Megan and sign up for her ebook here: http://www.meganwalrod.com