Trauma Means Different Things to Different People (continued, pg 2)

Defining Trauma

When you decide to come ‘earth side’, your soul begins its new agreement with the adults who facilitated that soul’s arrival; the birth mother and father. This is called a Soul Agreement and you may or may not have heard of the concept before. Essentially, if you think about it, that saying “you can choose your friends, but you can’t choose your family” is pretty much on the money when it comes to a basic view of soul agreements.

When a woman becomes pregnant, the adults involved have to sit and wait to see what arrives first and then that little blank canvas with its own individual little soul starts being painted by all the adults with all the paint brushes at the disposal of those adults. Little ones, big ones, the wrong type of paint, paint that’s gone off, oil paint, watercolor, acrylic, then someone might chuck in a pastel or a French chalk or some charcoal.

And so begins the soul agreement.

The relationship starts to take place from the minute conception occurs and with some people with depression and anxiety this might have to be the place to start with joining the dots.

"You can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future.” Steve Jobs

Birth or in utero stories can formulate an explanation for why depression or anxiety began. Even what numbered child you are. Without going into a science digest lesson, emotions have energy, and when a baby is growing inside its mother’s womb, there’s an exchange of energy both from the mother and the father. This is where the genetic links can also be included to start building the puzzle.

So we move on past the beginning and the painting starts.

It’s the beginning of a Masterpiece.

What happens with that little soul is sometimes it brings things with it, but most significantly, it’s the adults around it, physical- ly, emotionally and spiritually are adding to that painting every day.

Children are open books, they are empaths and they have no way of being able to process the adult concepts around them. So, say for example, Mum and Dad are in their early 20’s. Their brains have not finished growing yet, they both had horrible childhoods and while they were in love, they decided to get married and start their own family. The baby is crying and Mum is pregnant with number two and Dad is working his butt off to bring home money so that they can afford to live. The toddler can feel the tension and not knowing what’s going on, might start feeling sooky, because the toddler doesn’t know what it’s processing. Then that just makes matters worse and one of the adults lose their shit and yells at the toddler for coming up for cuddle, gets in the way and the adult trips over because they didn’t know the toddler was there. That toddler now has a pock- et of emotional trauma that it doesn’t know how to process float- ing around in its body as a first time situation.

So as life goes on, that first bit of emotional trauma might have other things show up that are similar and still while the child doesn’t know what it’s processing, it creates another memory that’s a little bit similar and then behaviors start to modify, because the child is now evolving into this state of behavior be- cause of the memories stored.

Then that child goes through puberty and a whole different chemical shit storm is brewing, and peer pressure comes into the equation and the painting is starting to get a whole heap of new paint strokes with all these different mediums and sploosh, one day the painting is done and for some it’s not something bright and beautiful and uplifting like one of Monet’s Garden, but it might look like some train wreck that Salvador Dali painted while listening to his favorite tunes about LSD.

Then adulthood arrives. The brain stops growing and awareness kicks in about all the shit that happened when you were younger and if the stress chemicals haven’t already been activated, when you’ve got to be an adult, they really start to get busy.

So, to help you understand, there is no right or wrong level of trauma.

Depending on the people in your life and the story your soul came here to live, you might have experienced a horrible level of trauma as a toddler with a primary love language of touch being pushed away by an adult that’s just stubbed their toe, all the way through to an eighteen year old teenager whose parents expect them to be a doctor because all the eldest children for six

generations have been doctors and they enjoy drama and literature more than they do physics and calculus.

Trauma is immune to judgement when it comes to someone’s personal journey around anxiety and depression. It’s my belief that’s why so much of it goes unspoken, because one person’s personal trauma might be another person’s perfect day.

The one thing I have learned the most in the last six years of practice is that everyone’s trauma needs to be honored. What might look like a bit of a frown on the outside for someone, in energy terms is like an ongoing taser charge buzzing around in their head. Humans never cease to amaze me with what they have going on on the inside versus how they are showing up on the outside.

Let me tell you that it very VERY rarely matches.

So one day when I did have rooms that I saw clients personally, I had a lady arrive who just said that she’d heard about me and needed a session. So she lay down on the couch and I explained what I was going to do and then went off to the other corner of my office and started typing out what I could see stuck. This was my first client that showed me that I got information after the specific session was finished.

When I finished and I read the report out to her, she just burst into tears and was pretty much inconsolable. I just sat there with her for 30 minutes while she cried and cried and cried just rub- bing her back. She still hadn’t told me what the issue that had triggered this horrible level of emotion.

When she was able to speak and I asked what had happened, her boyfriend had split up with her, and while she was explaining that to me, I got a picture of a bottle of pills in my mind’s eye.

So I asked her if she had been to the doctor for anti-depressants. She told me that she had an appointment at the doctor that after- noon to get some and I told her point blank, “if you swallow all those pills they’ll just make you sick and you’ll throw them back up. You aren’t meant to die today.”

She just burst back into tears with this begging look on her face and said “are you sure?”

That was the day I knew that the work I had done had just saved a life. That has happened to me probably five times since with people all over the world. The emotional traumatic memory needs to be released so that the brain can start a fresh to build a new reality.

The best way to describe my experience with people who are living with depression and anxiety – always living in my books, never suffering - is that their computer drive is chocker-block full of data and there’s only enough room for those start up pro- grams that include breathe in – breathe out. When I do my work, it is like a giant emptying of the cache and a defrag at the same time. Best yet, energy doesn’t lie and there’s no hiding, so I get to see what’s putting the human into such a state of desperation and speak it, giving them permission to know that they are having a human experience.

One of the most defining comments I read once was that the Universe, Source, God, whatever term you use in your daily life, isn’t a de-gifter. You are never going to be given something you can’t handle in your life. If you couldn’t handle it, it wouldn’t be there for you to deal with. In my Australian speak, I just say that the Universe isn’t an arsehole. It’s never going to set you up to fail.

It just doesn’t work that way.

Taking the positive step of seeking help, whether from someone like me (an energy worker), or an acupuncturist, a psychologist, counsellor, a medical practitioner is the first step in knowing that you’ve actually got this.

You’ve got the ability to get through whatever is here making you feel hopeless.

Sometimes you just might need someone else to show you just how much you do have a handle on everything.

My tip to you is (Continue reading)

Growing up in Australia with a Grandmother an active particIpant in her childhood, Amanda had been around natural therapies and concepts since 10 months of age back in 1971. Practicing since the age of 16 in understanding how emotions impact’s health when she learned about Neuro Emotional Technique from her Chiropractor. Amanda spent the first 21 years of her career in mass communications and administration in inter- national and domestic large industry specializing in understand- ing human nature. In 2009 she decided to take the leap into her Natural Therapy future. Developing a unique process called Emotional Strength Training, Amanda is able to see emotional memory stuck in her clients body and then uses a process to sweep it away like a giant broom. Amanda is a medically friendly practitioner who stands by her belief that working together with medicine, patients can expect great outcomes and eventual- ly be medication free as the chemical harmony is restored in the system.  Amanda's Website